don't worry, i'm fine

dear blog readers,

firstly, i would like to apologize for not updating my blog for quite some time.. and for deleting the two previous posts,.. i had been going through a so-called 'repairing phase'.. -was recovering from some sort of trauma... and the weather had been bad lately... well, bad for me (it had been raining, on and off), but it might not have been bad for you... and so, i suffered the consequences of me, being non-compliance to my meds, oh well..

i guess i need to reassure everyone, shinLoo especially, (i was surprised to get your text message that day, worried), so, i need to reassure you all that i am fine...

people break, all the time, but people recover, given time...

i shall try not to blog too much about depressing things, my blog itself had been pretty depressing already... firstly, the color itself, being black, dark, is depressing.... the wards, had been depressing, with healthy patients coming back, sick, stories which painfully make your heart sore... and there goes the counter-transference theory and all..

and depression, is contagious, therefore, i had to quarantine myself, at least for a while... it is funny though, how depression sometimes manifest itself in physical signs and symptoms, but i shall talk about that, maybe next time...

there was this book i read lately: For one more day (by Mitch Albom), about the line, between living and dying. You draw this line somewhere in this world, and if you never cross it, you'll never consider throwing yourself off a building or swollowing a bottle of pills - but if you do (cross that imaginary line), you might. And you would ask yourself, how close would you actually get to the line?

the truth is, THERE IS NO LINE. there is only your life, how you messed it up, and who is there to save you.

or who isn't.

on the lighter tone, there will be sunshine after the rain, always.. and not forgetting the beautiful rainbow, only if you bother to look :)

cheers!