hopeless= a tragical vocabulary

'hopeless' he said

i never knew letting go could be this hard.
the feeling was like when the surgeon came out from the operation thether,
still in his surgical scrubs
he removed his mask
gave that solemn look
offered that pat on the shoulder
and then, you know,
you just know...

after those days in ICU.
those failed resuscitation attempts,
i guess, you had finally given up...
i should be grateful, thankful, i know.
to have you holding on longer than your body could sustain,
but i guess,
the day has come...

today, it is the day i shall be grieving...
thank you,
thanks for accompanying me all this 3 and a half years...
on hectic days, when i was rushing assignments, meeting deadlines, you were there for me,
on boring days, you were there to light up my life,
on bad hair days, you were there to cheer, to listen, to make things right...
and after 3.5 years, which probably translate to 70years in your world,
you let go your last beep,
and i didn't even get to day goodbye...



















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footnote: notebook officially died today secondary to multiple organ failure